Kiss
Puke
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
