In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
