with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize