i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
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i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
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That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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