sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
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