Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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