Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Are we still banned from the library?
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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