found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
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