He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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