you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
