South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
its liver damage thursday
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
