idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
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