Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
