i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
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