he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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