i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
