we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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