saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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