So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
