i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Dicks are not precious.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
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