ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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