omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
