how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
one might say we're banned from that church
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
my poor anus
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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