I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
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