Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
They are going to name an STD after you.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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