Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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