I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
