READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I want to be your penis for a week.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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