I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
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