They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
