i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
