fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
