i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Randomize
