if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Randomize
