Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
