haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
