We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize
