There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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