im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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