What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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