She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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