I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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