3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
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