Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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