Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
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