He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Randomize
