Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
