last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I wish they made helmets for livers.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
