I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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