Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
